Although quite a strange a question to ask upfront, it is a valid question that I have been asked by several of my students and teachers at the school and friends and family from home. It's all out of love (as my parents were and even the airport security were worried in the beginning as I sobbed my way through to my gate) and just their means of checking up on me to make sure I'm adjusting okay. I've always wondered how people make friends and start anew moving to a place where they know absolutely no one-no friends, family, etc. I guess the most obvious would be your co-workers and joining a rec league or something along those lines. It's normal to be a little anxious about moving somewhere new-- throw in a foreign language, and it just takes it up a whole other level!
My very first week you could say that my friend group consisted of older peeps, by old I mean the 50+ year old English department, an 80 year old couple that told me they would be my grandparents here (who btw didn't even remember me the next week I saw them until I mentioned "chica americana!"-guess that's what happen as we age), some 40 year old woman from South America who constantly texted me out to get drinks, and a 60+ woman that owned a make-up store who looked younger than me. I am, as you probably know, using "friends" here as a really loose term. You must be wondering, how did I met these randoms? --When I first got here, I ran by a kiosko stand that was selling maps. The owner has worked there for 9 years and knew right off the bat I was not from Vigo so he introduced me to all the regulars that were walking by.
After the first week of settling in, I started to become close to my London and German roommate who introduced me to their friends (a mix of Scottish, Irish, English, and Spanish people)--people my age! The next weekend I decided I would post in the auxiliares facebook group to see if anyone wanted to travel with me to the Islas Cies as all the friends I had made were all natives who had already been there. Luckily, I got three responses. I was anxious about the trip as I had not met any of them before, but we were all on the same boat. We all got really close over the trip, and they are some of my closest friends here. They then introduced me to their friends, and I introduced them to my roommates and their friends so the circle just got bigger and bigger. That's kind of how it's been working so far. I'm not a friend expert by any means--seriously, my childhood best friend can tell you that I became friends with her by being the biggest pushover, I joined the cheerleading squad and made my AIM screename (remember that?!) vipersnake900 because she said she wouldn't be my friend if I didn't --but anyways, here are a couple of tips that have helped me so far:
1. don't be afraid to venture solo -- it's all a matter of being active and getting out there! Explore the city and get lost! Definitely easier said than done but try your best
2. take on a "yes" attitude -- obviously you have to be practical about things and stay safe but tomar algo, watch a movie in Spanish, go out in churruca, etc.
3. be open and make an effort to establish a relationship -- everyone has a story to tell, you just have to take the time to listen. Strike up a convo. with the barman, get to know someone you have just been introduced to, etc.
4. get to know the people you see everyday (i.e. the grocery clerk, the gym staff, etc.) -- it's a great way to practice speaking Spanish, and if you're lucky, you might find yourself getting some nice perks. I occasionally get free candy from the kiosko man, and the nail salon lady gives me awesome discounts!
5. use the internet -- in this day in age, this sounds like a horrible horrible idea, but there are legit meetup groups to do things like language exchanges, the erasmus page sets up weekend trips, and expat blogs have communities that help you adjust and give suggestions of places to go to wherever you are
6. smile and be positive! -- People want to be around good energy and happy people!
I feel so blessed to have already met so many amazing people. I've met people out, during my travels, everywhere! Coming here solo has really put things in perspective: I've lived in Maryland my whole life and have a lot of family there and friends from childhood. Hence, I've never really tried to meet new people when I'm home. I go out with the same people, and usually when we go out, we branch off and talk to boys or something along those lines. Here, when we go out, although I am looking to meet some chicos guapos--I'm looking to make native friends as well. It makes me think about how many potential great friendships I've missed back at home always staying in my comfort zone. The same thing happened in college. My first year was awesome, and everyone was looking to meet everyone! And then as the year goes, you start to solidify your friend group and join clubs that by my third year (at least for me), I started to hang out with the same people and didn't branch out as much. Of course, I continued to meet people, but it wasn't the same as first year.
Being in Vigo has really been a breath of fresh air for me, and I'm constantly meeting new people from all over the world. I've felt at home since I first arrived, and everyone has been so welcoming. I am so blessed to have been put in a school with such passionate and kind teachers and to have students and friends here who have made me feel at home. May you all find your home away from home wherever you may be!
Yours truly,
TLT
My very first week you could say that my friend group consisted of older peeps, by old I mean the 50+ year old English department, an 80 year old couple that told me they would be my grandparents here (who btw didn't even remember me the next week I saw them until I mentioned "chica americana!"-guess that's what happen as we age), some 40 year old woman from South America who constantly texted me out to get drinks, and a 60+ woman that owned a make-up store who looked younger than me. I am, as you probably know, using "friends" here as a really loose term. You must be wondering, how did I met these randoms? --When I first got here, I ran by a kiosko stand that was selling maps. The owner has worked there for 9 years and knew right off the bat I was not from Vigo so he introduced me to all the regulars that were walking by.
After the first week of settling in, I started to become close to my London and German roommate who introduced me to their friends (a mix of Scottish, Irish, English, and Spanish people)--people my age! The next weekend I decided I would post in the auxiliares facebook group to see if anyone wanted to travel with me to the Islas Cies as all the friends I had made were all natives who had already been there. Luckily, I got three responses. I was anxious about the trip as I had not met any of them before, but we were all on the same boat. We all got really close over the trip, and they are some of my closest friends here. They then introduced me to their friends, and I introduced them to my roommates and their friends so the circle just got bigger and bigger. That's kind of how it's been working so far. I'm not a friend expert by any means--seriously, my childhood best friend can tell you that I became friends with her by being the biggest pushover, I joined the cheerleading squad and made my AIM screename (remember that?!) vipersnake900 because she said she wouldn't be my friend if I didn't --but anyways, here are a couple of tips that have helped me so far:
1. don't be afraid to venture solo -- it's all a matter of being active and getting out there! Explore the city and get lost! Definitely easier said than done but try your best
2. take on a "yes" attitude -- obviously you have to be practical about things and stay safe but tomar algo, watch a movie in Spanish, go out in churruca, etc.
3. be open and make an effort to establish a relationship -- everyone has a story to tell, you just have to take the time to listen. Strike up a convo. with the barman, get to know someone you have just been introduced to, etc.
4. get to know the people you see everyday (i.e. the grocery clerk, the gym staff, etc.) -- it's a great way to practice speaking Spanish, and if you're lucky, you might find yourself getting some nice perks. I occasionally get free candy from the kiosko man, and the nail salon lady gives me awesome discounts!
5. use the internet -- in this day in age, this sounds like a horrible horrible idea, but there are legit meetup groups to do things like language exchanges, the erasmus page sets up weekend trips, and expat blogs have communities that help you adjust and give suggestions of places to go to wherever you are
6. smile and be positive! -- People want to be around good energy and happy people!
I feel so blessed to have already met so many amazing people. I've met people out, during my travels, everywhere! Coming here solo has really put things in perspective: I've lived in Maryland my whole life and have a lot of family there and friends from childhood. Hence, I've never really tried to meet new people when I'm home. I go out with the same people, and usually when we go out, we branch off and talk to boys or something along those lines. Here, when we go out, although I am looking to meet some chicos guapos--I'm looking to make native friends as well. It makes me think about how many potential great friendships I've missed back at home always staying in my comfort zone. The same thing happened in college. My first year was awesome, and everyone was looking to meet everyone! And then as the year goes, you start to solidify your friend group and join clubs that by my third year (at least for me), I started to hang out with the same people and didn't branch out as much. Of course, I continued to meet people, but it wasn't the same as first year.
Being in Vigo has really been a breath of fresh air for me, and I'm constantly meeting new people from all over the world. I've felt at home since I first arrived, and everyone has been so welcoming. I am so blessed to have been put in a school with such passionate and kind teachers and to have students and friends here who have made me feel at home. May you all find your home away from home wherever you may be!
Yours truly,
TLT